Truthful campaign speech

We killed JFK. We did 9/11. We gave the poison gas to our mercenaries in Syria and blamed it on Assad. We trained the actors and staged a bunch of fake psy ops from Boston to Miami and beyond to terrify you. We set up the financial crisis, ripped you off, and profited. So, please, please go out and punch a button on our voting computer, and think we will let you get rid of us.

For every secret you have that affects a small circle, we have hundreds of secrets by which we kill millions and steal billions with impunity. It is our sworn duty to ourselves and the elites to protect our secrets and as a token, we pretend to respect your privacy, but record every last shred of your lives. As a bonus, we even sell your private information to foreign corporations and governments. Hah!